When I can act like an ethnomusicologist

I just had a really cool moment this morning while I was working on my thesis. I am trying to finish up some revisions on my first chapter, which provides a history of popular music in the French Antilles. I needed to find more examples of healing in the music there, so I looked at my Patrick Saint Eloi CD and found a song called "Rehabilitation."

When I listened to the song I immediately noticed that he included an introduction that was supposed to evoke the African heritage of Guadeloupe, using a cappella call-and-response and lanbi (conch shell). Then I noticed that he has a short musical intro which introduces the zouk style of the song, but layers it on top of gwo ka drumming.

Then I UNDERSTOOD THE LYRICS IN GUADELOUPEAN CREOLE. And so I know that it is a tribute to the history of slavery in Guadeloupe (constantly saying that they are asking for rehabilitation). AND later in the song I immediately recognized a rhythm that is taken from Carnival festivities in Guadeloupe, which St. Eloi includes on the lanbi (which is only used in gwo ka Carnival bands).

Basically, I am pleased.

The Fresh Market's Christmas Blend Coffee

If I had to describe The Fresh Market, I would say that it is like Whole Foods, but without all the veg stuff. You're probably wondering why such a place exists, and I have concluded that it is because it is from North Carolina, where no one cares about vegetarians, but they apparently care about fresh, organic, and/or international foods (basically everything is really expensive there).

THE POINT IS. Every Christmas time they come out with a Christmas Blend coffee, which the Donnellys guzzle around the clock come December 24th. It has a delicious and light flavor, and I never could quite put my finger on what exact flavors made up a Christmas blend.

Apparently it is cinnamon hazelnut. I say this because I just bought some cinnamon hazelnut coffee two days ago, and it is quite close in taste to the Christmas Blend. The enigmatic flavor of my holiday coffee has been solved, and I am not quite sure how I feel about it.

Strange dreams...

So yesterday morning, my body decided to wake up at 7:45 a.m. I thought I would carpe diem and rearrange the furniture in my room. There were many logistical problems with the previous setup; mainly, I didn't have a bookshelf to hold the books, magazines, and CDs that I am using as sources for my thesis (the result being piles of stuff all over my floor).

Those of you who have seen (or helped me move) my furniture know that nearly all of my pieces are made of sturdy and heavy solid wood (none of that Ikea pressed board crap for me). In addition, many of you know how embarrasingly weak I am, and that I have had tendinitis in both of my arms since the age of 11 (thanks mom and dad for scheduling junior golf and tennis back to back).

As you can imagine, after moving my furniture around for several hours, I was pooped. I decided to read an article on participatory and presentational performance while re-aligning my back on my bed. Bad idea. I fell asleep (see My bed), and proceeded to have a really really strange dream.

My dream took place one year in the future. I had moved to either Chicago or New York (to get my PhD) and somehow with the advice of my friend Nate (see Things that Nate Likes), I had decided to move into an urban apartment with a bunch of hipster dudes.

Nate was helping me move, but I got tired and took a nap (yes a nap within a nap) and when I woke up one of the other inhabitants had arrived. I thought that there were only two bedrooms so I grew increasingly confused about how many people would be in each room (seeing how I didn't want to share a room with a dirty hipster guy). Shortly after I had this thought, I realized that the living room was another bedroom that was quite large.

Then another hipster showed up. He had long, soft and wavy red hair and ridiculous glasses. He was wearing a flannel shirt. This dude looked really familiar. I commented on this and he said something along the lines of "Sorry, I only keep in touch with people I like, so I guess that is why we don't remember who each other are." And I replied, "well... me too, but you look familiar." Then I figured out that he had been in my preschool class when I lived in D.C.

The weirdest part of all of this, is that when I woke up and thought about the dream, I realized that the hipster dude in that dream actually did look like my best friend in preschool in D.C. The only exception was that this person was a girl in real life, but they looked exactly the same (except one was a small three-year old girl, and the other was a twenty-something dirty hipster guy).

WEIRD.

Call me William D. Brohn

In the College of Music newsletter that was sent out yesterday there was an article with this headline:

"Work of alumnus William D. Brohn to be celebrated in London gala"

You would think that they would use his head shot for the visual aide. However, they chose to use this picture instead:


If you had to describe this photo, you would probably say that it is a picture of me shaking the dean's hand with Brohn admirably smiling in my direction (I had just given the commencement speech). The point is, he is not the focal point of the photo, he just happens to be in the middle.

I would like to start convincing people that I am him and that I orchestrated a million famous musicals. Hurray for Galas in London for me!

Good job MSU...

Enhanced in Translation

I just remembered and wanted to point out that the French word for model is mannequin.













Maybe we should start calling them mannequins in the US as well...

Things like this:

So I was reading over the draft of the first chapter of my thesis with comments from my adviser and I noticed that he wanted me to discuss Eurovision (European song/singing competition in which France chose a Guadeloupean to sing in 1990 and it was a big deal).

Like most things with my thesis, I had known about this for so long that I had no idea where I could find a source that discussed it. I thought that my "Musique aux Antilles" book might have something, so I took it out. Then, to procrastinate I opened it up in the middle to look at the pictures that are included.

Well guess what? I opened the book to the CHAPTER on EUROVISION. I opened it, and saw the heading "L'Eurovision" and inwardly squealed with glee. I then remembered that I also have a fieldnote that discusses this.

Hurray!

The most horrifying thing ever...

For those of you who don't know, this device is used by dermatologists to "extract" blemishes. On Wednesday my dermatologist went to town on my face with this thing, and I don't think it will ever be the same again. It was remarkably painful (my eyes were watering uncontrollably), and now my face is erupting with a vengeance.

However, on a happier note... tonight I tried out a new conditioner and it was most likely the most amazing conditioning experience of my life. Behold:

I bought this the other day because: 1. It was on sale and 2. I have ridiculously dry hair and have had to seriously change the frequency with which I wash it. It went far beyond my expectations.

I am at a loss for words

So I was just booking my flight to visit New York in October (Columbia U for PhD visits), and the most bizarre thing happened:

I was pretty pleased with my fare of $169.00 from Detroit to Laguardia non-stop, and I added travel insurance on for $15.00. Then when I entered my card info I received a notice that said that my fare of $184.00 was no longer available.

I was furious. Until I kept reading and it said that my new fare was $122.00!!!!

WOOHOOO!

The fact that this exists:

And that it is currently being shipped to my apartment. I have been studying lyrics so much lately that I am starting to understand more and more creole(kweyol).

Nightly Rant

Ok, so in a nutshell, today was not a good day. Sounds pretty normal for my life now, considering I am writing my thesis, applying to graduate schools, teaching 100 students, taking the GRE in less than two weeks, working in the library, and taking classes on top of that. However, I experienced a series of events this afternoon/early evening that were just so irritating that it is was ridiculous and therefore, funny.

It all started in my ethnomusicology seminar. We did an in-class activity where we had to transcribe the melody from an Afro-Peruvian song, and then write our transcription on an overhead and then have the entire class look at it. This gave me anxiety, even though it wasn't a problem in the end.

Let me mention at this point that my boss scheduled me to work at 3 even though I had class until 3:10. I hate being late for work so I was constantly looking at my watch from 3:00 on. 3:15 rolled around and we were still having class. Someone pointed this out and we started getting up but then there were many announcements relating to our assignment that is due on Thursday. I am not sure when I got out of there, but I knew that I needed coffee before work.

This took me to the MSU Library Cyber Cafe (also known as Sparty's- Library Cyber Cafe Location). For those of you who are familliar with Sparty's, you know that it generally is sub-par in coffee quality, and in service.

When I google-image searched cyber cafe, this photo came up. It has an albino squirrel calendar in the back, which I think deemed it worthy of this blog.

Once I was in line, I realized that I had FORGOTTEN MY WALLET at home. However, I had recently done laundry and had some quarters in my bag. I figured out that I had just enough to get a small coffee. So, I asked for a small ICED coffee.

When I got to the register, the price was more than I could pay for and I realized that iced coffee is TWENTY cents more expensive than regular. (My boss later pointed out that this is OLD coffee that you are paying more for.) So I told the cashier I couldn't afford it and asked for a small regular coffee. He asked me if I wanted a tall, I said sure and then he said the SAME PRICE AS THE ICED COFFEE. I repeated that I wanted a SMALL and he said "Oh, tall and small are not the same thing." The point is that he rang me up and I had to take ten pennies out of the "leave a penny, take a penny" bin.

Then came the task of preparing my coffee. I took off the lid and for the first time in history, they had actually filled the cup all the way up- which in most circumstances would be great but I wanted milk. So I drank a little to make room but then I noticed that they were out of splenda on that side, so I had to go to the other coffee station to get a splenda packet. Once I returned to the first station to put cream in the coffee, I found that THEY WERE OUT OF MILK. When I told the person working that they were out of milk, she said, "Oh, thanks for telling us," and walked away. I then had to flag her down again, and ask for milk. She asked me to wait for a second, but finally delivered.

Relieved that I was finally away from Sparty's, I then made my way to the elevator to go to work. I got on, the doors closed, I pressed the button for the fourth floor, and ... NOTHING HAPPENED. THE ELEVATOR WAS BROKEN. We were trapped momentarily until I pressed the first floor button and the doors reopened. I ended up taking the back elevator and arriving at work at 3:35, thirty-five minutes late.

And the following events that sucked:
- All I wanted to do when I got to work was check my email and the internet was down
- After work I had an hour to input grades into angel and somehow they didn't save and I had to do it again
- At jazz band the director FORGOT MY MUSIC TO A PIECE FOR THE FIFTH CONSECUTIVE REHEARSAL. This was the last straw, and I sat off to the side studying vocabulary.

Ok, I feel much better now.

Lorax Weekly

Alex: I've decided that if i were famous I would always bring you as my awards show date because it would make for great red carpet interviews

and man oh man would the lesbo rumors fly

Minivangelism

Unfortunately, I do not have a photo of this, but when I went home in July the Lorax was driving and came upon a colorfully decorated mini van.

I can't remember if the owners of the van were actually affiliated with a church (meaning the purpose of the van was to transport church-folk around), or if they were letting their opinions be known for the greater good, but they had written all over the windows with evangelical writings. Among them was this phrase brazenly plastered over their back window:

"Hells real."

Now maybe they did have the proper apostrophe, but I certainly didn't notice it at the time.

I can't help but think of someone adding "hells real" to affirm the validity of an outlandish statement. For example:

Person 1: "I just won tickets to the Tyra show!"
Person 2: "Are you for real?"
Person 1: "Hells real."

Speaking of the Tyra show, on Friday they definitely had a group of teenage girls on who hazed another girl because she wouldn't share her big jars of pickles with them. Oh the joys of boarding school...

Student Shenanigans

- When students start emails with: "So I know this is probably really annoying, but..."

- When students just completely forget about going to your class and then email you begging for mercy. (This had never happened to me before yesterday, but it happened TWICE)

Living under a rock

So apparently the VMAs happened recently, and apparently Kanye West was a jerk to Taylor Swift, and APPARENTLY it was a big deal. (Also, sorry Lexi- I thought that thing was funny even when I didn't understand what it was parodying- but now it is funnier).

Overzealous Musicology Books...

For those of you who don't know, Montiverdi's Orfeo was written in 1607 and is one of the earliest examples of opera. And while it was all the rage at the time (for two performances until it wasn't again performed for 300 years), nowadays it is a little on the dull side (or a lot on the dull side).

Well, the text that I am using for the class I teach describes Orfeo as, "a brilliant musical kaleidoscope of genres and forms." Wow.

WOW.

That's pretty much all I have to say about that.

...Also, the word "ducal" makes me laugh sometimes...

When squirrels do this:

...for an extended period of time.

As I was getting out of the shower today I opened the bathroom window to let out all of the steam (we do not have a fan), and directly in view was a squirrel, on its hind-legs, frozen in time in the middle of the parking lot.

Of all places, a parking lot where reckless undergrads commonly screech by is probably the worst place for a squirrel to be standing.

I think that the squeaking of my bathmat in the shower may have provoked this encounter, but this is not the first time, nor the last, that I have seen a squirrel standing for extended periods of time, frozen in place, in an unfortunate location.

Being horrified by people at Meijer

Has anyone else noticed that people shopping at Meijer have gotten fatter and fatter? It is really unsettling to come between morbidly obese people and their food...

Behold, a picture that Geoff took in the parking lot the other day. Not only were these people too lazy to put their carts back (which just in case anyone is wondering- it was NOT raining or cold), but they were too lazy to throw away their McDonalds that they were apparently eating WHILE shopping for food (in case anyone was wondering about THIS- there is NOT a McDonalds in Meijer- infact, the closest McDonalds is several miles away). Just when you thought it couldn't get any more Michigan-y...


I am not sure how exactly this happened, but I know it involved people being too lazy to put away their carts and two cases of beer. Somehow I am not surprised.

Hilarious censorship

Alex: oh my god

instead of "fuck you, fuck you"

"suck it you falafel!"

Don't you love how an otherwise serious movie can become a comedy when you watch it on television. I would like to know whose job it is to come up with phrases and words to be played over the NSFTV sections. I would then like to steal their job and come up with the most hilarious substitutions.

Chicago (pt. 1)

So yesterday I came, ulcer and all, to Chicago and it has thus far been awesome. We got into town yesterday afternoon and decided to eat Mexican food. Seeing how East Lansing has zero good Mexican restaurants, this dinner was AMAZING. I had a delicious vegetarian burrito (filled with potatoes, refried beans, onions, and peppers) with a stripe of guacamole across the top. Delicious!

Then we headed to the Chicago Jazz Festival to see the Dave Holland Big Band perform! In case you didn't know, Chris Potter plays lead tenor in the group and he is amazing.

The bari player was laying it down, which I always enjoy, and the drummer and vibes player were also really good. Chris Potter's solo pretty much stole the show though.

After the performance we went to the bar. Since I can't drink alcohol I have begun to experiment with non-alcoholic beverages. Tonic water with lime is my new favorite but I also had a ROOT BEER FLOAT!

It was heavenly. But pretty much anything involving icecream is heavenly in my eyes.

This:

I also like the fact that my boyfriend thinks to send me these things. In another story, I have taken 3200mg of Advil in the past 24 hours and just a few minutes ago I ran into a parking meter (with my body).

NOT being sick

I have been in a nearly perpetual state of misery for the past two weeks due to illness. Most recently, I have been suffering from a "large ulcer on my right tonsilar pillar,"accompanied by a fever. I spent most of the day sleeping and the rest of it sitting on the couch with poor posture.

However, at about midnight I decided that I wasn't going to take this crap anymore. So, I went to the Meijer Pharmacy section and now I have this regimen to ease the pain:


Begin with an oral antiseptic to gargle...





Followed by 800 mg of Advil...

Then I lightly dab hydrogen peroxide on it with a cotton swab (not to be tried by amateurs).

Which I follow by applying anbesol to the immediate area...

And I finish it off with a carefully-aimed spray of Chloraseptic max.



Unfortunately, after all of this it still hurts so I am just going to go to bed and probably stay there all day tomorrow.

Two Line Exchanges

Alex: whatever happened to lil jon

moi: yeah, seriously

*****

Alex: aaaaand state lost

the score was 7 to 3

moi: haha lame

Alex: it was like watching a turtle hump a shoe

Cutting People Off

Specifically, at this intersection (Exhibit A):

You know the one: going South on Abbott just after crossing E. Saginaw. I laugh in the face of that right lane ends sign; I scoff at the long line of people waiting in the left lane at the red light. That's right, I'm THAT guy.

Since I've been cutting people off at this intersection nearly every day for the past year, I have it down to a science. I know all too well that three seconds after the right turn arrow goes red I should hit the accelerator.

Just to clarify, I am not some evil being who revels in pissing other people off. My practice of cutting people off doesn't stem from enmity or ill-will, it all goes back to rush hour in North Raleigh many summers ago...

I was in the car with my sister, who doesn't take crap from anyone, going North on Falls of the Neuse Road. As we approached the intersection at Durant I saw that the left lane was terribly congested. Rather than continuing in the left lane, which is the only lane that goes straight at the next intersection, she sped into the right lane. A short scenario ensued in which she passed about fifty cars and then at the last second stealthy merged into the left lane before the light.

Exhibit B:

I stared at her in horror and made a disapproving sound. To this she simply rebutted "I wasn't going to wait in that line!" So to all of you people crossing Saginaw on Abbott going south:

I am not going to wait in that line either!

Morning Rants

Apparently, according to the Wall Street Journal, people who mosquitoes like to bite are not sufficiently stressed out. There is evidence that we excrete less mosquito-attracting chemicals when we are fretting about something.

However, anyone who knows me knows that this is probably not true seeing how I am in a constant state of mild to moderate worrying and I get EATEN ALIVE by the bugs.

Pour one out for our fallen homie, the oldest dog in the world who died at 21 yesterday. I really wish there was some kind of esoteric drink meant for dogs, but all I could come up with at this point was water... maybe pour one out of your water dish for our fallen homie?

Preview: DTR

Using other peoples' bathrooms can be a pleasant or traumatic experience.

The Ingham County Sheriff's name

Sheriff Gene Wrigglesworth. Nuff said.

Avoiding People

It's that time of the year again folks: the streets are crowded, beer cans litter the grass, and parents are driving around like idiots. That's right, time for school. Although some people might be excited for classes to start, I am dreading tomorrow morning because I despise small talk.

This includes but is not limited to: returning from Summer, Winter, and Spring break, encountering people you know but haven't talked to in a long time at the store, running into former students, going to parties with lame people that you don't know, servers at restaurants, sales people, people you sit next to on planes, and neighbors that you don't know but don't intend on befriending because they play awful music and have boxing matches in the parking lot that end in them harassing your roomate.

But since this blog is not about the negative I decided to say that I like avoiding people.

It is indeed a glorious feeling when you successfully manage to avoid a potentially awkward social situation. Like when I was at meijer getting ingredients for strawberry shortcake after a few glasses of wine and I noticed that my least favorite student of all time was at the next self-checkout station. This dude was a complete sociopath; I had no idea how to handle his antics. There is no telling what he would have done or said if he had noticed me so I just froze in place and kept my head down, which now that I think about it probably made me stand out more but the point is that he didn't see me and I left the meijer unscathed.

Lucky for me, I am only taking one class this semester and it only has five people in it. Yay for being an antisocial nerd!